Summertime and the Livin' is...
Hot!
During the recent Riverfest Regatta held in my beloved town of Augusta, the heat index was so high, yours truly reconsidered tossing aside her ladylike restraint and stripping down to her skivvies. Good thing there was a fainting couch nearby.
One of my many admirers was so concerned for the health and well-being of my poor self that they actually sent me the oddest contraption. Apparently, it is some kind of battery-operated portable fan. Naturally, as a Southern gentlewoman, I wasn't quite certain about such a device being worn beneath my petticoats, as the giver suggested. I was more concerned that the constant whirling sound it produced might spook the horses.
Nevertheless, I was quite appreciative of the giver's intent and posted a lovely thank-you letter composed in my most elegant hand. My former headmistress at the Ladies Seminary for Wayward Girl would be so proud. Although, I confess, I was compelled to post-script the tiniest bit of tutelage, which many persons (particularly of the most recent age and of the male persuasion) may be unaware. Very simply, when one promenades stylishly attired in wide hoop skirts, a refreshing ventilation naturally occurs. Therefore, on this sweltering high summer day, the upper portion of my anatomy may have resembled that of a sweathog, the lower portion - I assure you - remained cool as a cucumber.
Thank you for your kind concern.
